I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
