dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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