Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
