we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize