I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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