Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
