hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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