You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
