We're facebook friends in real life
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
