we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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