I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize