plz talk dirty to me
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
