Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I just found puke in my bra..
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
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