I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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