who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
