I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
He did a backflip because drugs
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
