Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
no, he came in my armpit
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
