With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
