So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
