Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
