its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Oh god it's open bar.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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