Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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