out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
