weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
And then my night got REAL pukey
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
