why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we're making bets on your personal life
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize