your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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