So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
