There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize