I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
