goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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