so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
