it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
