Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
