well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
