dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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