I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
