She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
