We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
