this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
