you turned your livingroom into a bong?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
this is an emotional support booty call
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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