make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Randomize
