Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize