I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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