Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
