Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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