she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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