OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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