so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
