I got chris browned last night
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
