Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
